Thoughts on Being a Dad

This has been a sweet, sweet adventure. To my right you can see a picture that we had professionally taken last Saturday. Our little Gloria Jane is 9 months old here and completely oblivious to how absolutely adorable she is. Whether i want to admit it or not, i am completely hooked on this little girl. She has kept my busier than i imagined it would be but i have had time to reflect and here are some thoughts on fatherhood after 9 months of practice:

1. Fatherhood is not for the faint of heart - This is not to say that my heart is bigger than the next guys but being a parent in general is highly underrated. The prerequisites for becoming a parent are entirely too easy to come by. Another danger is that parents say that being a parent is "so wonderful." It's like they ar trying to lull you into this false sense of security that it's easier than owning a brand new BMW. Why, who wouldn't want that? While it is "so wonderful", it is also "so hard". If you enjoy sleeping, you had better learn to live on very little sleep. I am told that the military deprives their privates of sleep to teach them strength. I'd like to see anyone of those guys try to take care of a sick 9 month old for a week. They'd have more strength than they could handle!

2. Fatherhood teaches me humility - When you are single, you live your life for yourself. When you are dating, you live your life mostly for yourself but you make room for this other person whom you are learning to love. Then you become married and more of yourself is put on the shelf as you make room for this person that you love. Now comes the hard part. When a baby comes along, you chose to put even more of your own desires on the shelf and direct that last part of yourself towards this precious little baby you helped bring into the world. This is not something that is done out of duty's sake but it is done out of the depths of love in your heart. The love that you have for this little one almost forces you to acts of service to take care of them. Doing something so small for someone so helpless makes you feel so tall even though they cannot thank you.

3. Fatherhood teaches me about my relationship with God - The bible correlates our relationship with God to many different metaphors but the one that is reaching out to me as of late is, of course, the metaphor of God as the Father as we as the child. Gloria doesn't understand that there are things in our house that are ok for her to touch and there are things in our house that are not ok. Climbing up on the couch...good! Climbing up on the gas fireplace... bad! Teaching her right and wrong is something that my wife and i do on a daily basis for her own good. She does not understand that as she looks at us with tears in her eyes wondering why we would possibly deprive her of free reign of the house. It is not that we dislike her that causes us to correct her wanting to touch a hot stove, but rather our love for her that makes us want to help her not get burned. Looking back on my life, i can think of several times that God kept me from different things in life and relationships. What a great Father we have! He knows me better than i know myself. He knows what would hurt me and rather than give some big explaination about why that thing didn't work out, he just shuts the door and we move on. Sometimes this is really tough to take and i think, "What's your probem? I had this all worked out and you ruined my plan! What's the big idea?!". As God is teaching me, the "big idea" is that He is God and i am not. He knows where the dangers are and if i would humble myself a little, i might see that. It also teaches me why He loves me. I love Gloria not because she can do anything for me but because she is mine. God loves me not because i can do all these wonderful thngs for Him but because i am His. That is a comforting thought.

Believe me, being a dad is "so wonderful" as they say, but make sure that you are ready emotionally. There will be sacrifices for sure, but when your little baby looks at you as though you are their favorite person, you know that you are where you need to be.